(Thank you to channel op, Ann Malone for providing this transcript.)

The first part of this transcript is the moderated portion of the chat. The order it was posted has been edited to make some sense. However, no typing errors have been corrected... nothing has been censored... what you read is what was said. Thankyouverymuch.

tgoddess Everyone, please welcome...for real this time...Joe Bob Briggs.

JoeBob Okay, everyone get nekkid.

Question from terre-bo What do you think is the goriest horror flick or all time?

terre-bo I'm partial to scalpings... I'd say "Maniac" (in 80s)

JoeBob You're asking me? I was going to make fun of everyone else's choices. "Maniac" is good, but . . .

"Saw" is still the king.

"Texas Chain Saw Massacre."

"Maniac" was great. What was that guy's name?

The main actor?

terre-bo saw many of 'em. I like campy flicks like "Rabid Grannies"

JoeBob He was in "Taxi Driver." He was the dispatcher.

terre-bo Not sure -- he was a mama's boy!

JoeBob Anyway, that was his claim to fame--a great character actor.

terre-bo What kind of gore do you like in horror flicks?

JoeBob Go ahead, shoot.

Annie I've got a long one from Izzy next....

Question from |zzY` Hey Joe Bob! I would have to say that my nomination for the best horror movie of all time would be "Evil Dead 2" starring Bruce Campbell. (Any of the films in the trilogy "Evil Dead", "Evil Dead 2", "Army of Darkness" are great...) It's become a cult classic for its mix of comedy, horror, and cheesy effects. My question is, how do you think Sam Raimi did with this film that didn't quite work the first time as "Evil Dead", and what do you think of the stuff he' (Annie's "copy & paste" cut off |zzY`)

|zzY` Hey JoeBob!

Annie That's a long one to read

JoeBob Hey, well, the answer is that Sam Raimi was a film student when . . . he made "Evil Dead," . . . and he "borrowed" the equipment from Michigan State . . . and everything was done so cheaply--he did the speical effects in his attic-- . . . that it's really a remarkable film because he had ZERO money.

|zzY` So what do you think of the stuff Raimi's doing now? I heard he's doing the new Spider Man live action movie. I agree, for no budget, that was a great flick.

JoeBob But you're right that it's one of the few sequels that's better than the original. Sam Raimi is incapable of a lousy movie. Sam Raimi did make one lame comedy, The ABC Murders.

Question from gertie so, this is the whittier girl, if you remeber from email, what do you suggest I do, in this boring little Nixon town, for Halloween?

JoeBob Well, certainly you should wear a Nixon mask.

Question from Mallrat In your opinion, what makes a better all-around quote-unquote horror film--one whose primary objective is to scare the bejesus out of you, or one that blends terror with comedy as so many horror films do?

JoeBob It's much more difficult to make a pure horror film. We live in a satiric age, but that will change. Everything goes in cycles in horror. In other words, I think a non-comedic horror film is a far more difficult thing to accomplish. Like "The Exorcist."

Mallrat is there any particular pure one that you truly love? would the Exorcist be it?

JoeBob Hellraiser. Black Sunday.

kurph To clarify....we will give you a "voice" when you see your question posted...from that point you have to minutes to talk with Joe Bob

Question from JCal What do you think of John Carpenter's The Thing?

JoeBob Love it! Think it's one of his best movies. But it's underrated.

JCal underated. i would agree on that

Question from mcginley 2joebob Q Hola from gin. Are there any new, "up-and-coming" directors in the horror genre worth keeping an eye on?

JoeBob Well, most horror directors are discovered after one film . . . so the most likely undiscovered director . . . is the one whose film hasn't come out yet. It's kind of a one-chance genre.

mcginley lol, i see!

JoeBob I guess Wes Craven got two chances.

mcginley rofl -- thanks

JoeBob I can type much faster if you'll send me the questions.

joker Keep sending your question to Annie for Joe Bob to answer.

Question from terre-bo Best/favorite horror flick from Troma?

JoeBob Best Troma film Bloodsucking Freaks. My favorite anyway.

terre-bo Seen it, it's mighty fine

Question from SashaofDe Hi Joe Bob ) What is your opinion on the feasibility of adapting Stephen King's Dark Tower series to the Screen? I think you would be great as Roland )

JoeBob I think I would be great as the Dark Tower. Well, Stephen King can be very very good as screen material . . . or very very bad . . . it would depend on the screenwriter and director.

Question from jeanne12 I was just wondering what JB looks for in any film he chooses to watch. Oh, and he may know me as the gal from the south.

JoeBob Yes, Jeanne from Charlotte, I know . . . The three B's of course Blood, breasts and beasts.

jeanne12 no, actually from kannapolis. but close, what do you look for in any film you choose to watch?

JoeBob Sorry, did I insult Kannapolis?

jeanne12 no, never

Question from Mallrat I'm curious to get your critique of "Andy Warhol's Dracula"......any insights?

JoeBob I'm not a big fan of those Andy Warhol horror films . . .

Mallrat why? Not that I am )

JoeBob because they made them in such a way that they're superior to the audience . . . and really superior to the story itself. . . . They're self-consciously campy. I like the gore, however.

Mallrat well, that's Andy in a nutshell 0

JoeBob Andy was critical of "Texas Chain Saw Massacre." Can you believe that?

Question from Vino Joe Bob .............. I find that horror movies these days are just not Scarey ............ I find myself laughing during them instead of being horrified............. Is there ANYONE actually making a real Horror movie any more ?? And when was the last time you actually were Horrified by a movie ?

JoeBob Well, I think the first "Scream" was scary, would you agree?

Vino I do find horror movies these days just a boar ................ not worth paying to go see. Not neccessarily

JoeBob Did you just see "What Lies Beneath" or something?

Vino Yes. When I can tell whats comin up its prety lame

JoeBob I find that, with many horror movies today, people either watach them on video . . . which is never going to be as scary as a theater . . .

Vino I have to see them on the big screen.

JoeBob or they watch them in an environment designed to put the movie down . . .

Vino My favorite was actually Omen ........... a long time ago

JoeBob you have to have some kind of emotional involvement, and there's an unwillingness to do that . . . again, I think it's the times we live in.

Vino Whats more scarey ............... Movies or the News

JoeBob I thought "Blair Witch" had mometns of terror. Mostly at the end.

Question from Doc JoeBob.......Do you see any chance of a return to the days before Holloween with the Hitchcock doing things behind closed doors and letting your imagination do all the work?

JoeBob I think those movies exist. On late-night cable. I'm trying to think of a recent example . . . It's difficult to do a movie that's very talky or understated.

Doc will DVD let things open up with the director's voice tracks added?

JoeBob I don't see how that would help.

Annie Kurph wants to know do you think the advances in special effects help or hurt horror movies

JoeBob Martin Scorsese is the master of creating a feeling of edginess without special effects. I think special effects always help horror movies . . . because the horror movie's antecedents are magic and illusion . . .

kurph I have seen good horror movies...and I have seen good special effects...never both

JoeBob and it's the only genre that's designed to mislead you . . . and surprise you.

The Exorcist?

"I see dead people."

kurph good point...excellent movie

LOL

Question from |zzY` Joe Bob, did you see the spoof "Scary Movie" by the Wayans brothers, and what did you think of it?

JoeBob Haven't seen "Scary Movie" yet. People send me emails talking about it, though.

|zzY` Seen it a few weeks ago. It was great.

JoeBob QUIT SPOILING THE PLOT!

Annie lol

|zzY` Very funny... check it out! Thanks JB!

JoeBob I love all the Wayans.

How many Wayans are there?

Four, I think, counting the sister.

Question from Kelly Joe Bob, Do you think that we've seen so much that nothing is scary anymore?

JoeBob No, I think we just haven't FOUND the next scary thing yet. It's time to invent a new horror genre. What else could possibly be done David Cronenberg is always coming up with new stuff to ve afraid of . . . on the INSIDE of our bodies. I think that's been done Yes, by Cronenberg, but he keeps going to new levels with it.

Vino In your mind, what makes a good horror flick ?? Are there certain things you look for ?? Or is it just a gut feeling ?

Annie What is scary to YOU?

JoeBob Well, I'm a sucker for the closeup camera . . .

Vino To me, scarey movies make me not want to walk home after the movie.

JoeBob where you don't know what's going on just two or three feet away from the person . . . as he/she walks down a hallway . . . etners a basement . . . I've probably seen that 40,000 times and it still scares me.

Vino Seeing the entire Omen series in a sitting was prety bad for me ................... and Alien is one of my favorite shockers.

JoeBob I like stories that are NOT supernatural. Although I'm contradicting myself, because I love Hellraiser.

Question from nurseJan Joe Bob, do you think horror films will ever be "respectable" to film critics?

JoeBob Well, "I see dead people" got mainstream reviews. First zombie film that the regular critics liked. I think that "Die Hard" was basically a haunted house movie. And the critics seemed to love it. It was actually a Jason movie. Instead of the house, it was a high rise.

nurseJan they mostly seem to get bad reviews though

JoeBob Nope, sorry, I'm running behind here. Depends on the critic really. Some critics just can't stand horror on principle. Horror is a relatively small specialized audience.

Question from jeanne12 I love the old hammer films and anything with Vincent Price or Karlof, has JB seen the Screaming Skull yet?

jeanne12 what would be your perfect idea of a horror movie, including the director, and the actors?

JoeBob Too many choices. Clive Barker, Wes Craven, Sam Raimi. People working today, right? I love Arnold Vosloo. I love Robert Davi as a sleazeball.

Question from jagdescla does joebob like the living dead movies from romero ahd what was his favorite one?

JoeBob I like the first two "Living Dead" movies. I don't like "Day of the Dead." Don't know why . . . It's just sorta . . . lifeless.

jagdescla yea...dawn of the dead is my favorite all action

JoeBob I also like Return of the Living Dead. Oh yeah, STuart Gordon!

Annie who is your favorite horror screamer of all time? (that one was from tgoddess)

JoeBob Based on screaming ability? Or looks?

Annie both

JoeBob I would have to say Marilyn Burns as a screamer. And Michelle Bauer for her beauty.

Sybil Danning was extraordinarily beautiful, . . . but didn't really make horror films.

Well, she WAS a lesbian.

Annie lol

JoeBob Right?

Question from Mallrat Another quickie here, was it surprising to you that "Slumber Party Massacre" was directed by a woman?

Mallrat it's sleazieness is something you don't often see a woman do...why is that?--I think that's great that she did are there very many female horror directors?

JoeBob I didn't think "Slumber Party Massacre" was that great, to tell you the truth. I'd give it 2 and a half stars. There have been a few, but no successful ones.

Mallrat oh, I would totally agree

JoeBob The woman who did "Humanoids from the Deep" . . . does that count?

Mallrat I don't think its known for being great, right? sleazy and cheesy ) yeah, it counts, hee hee!

JoeBob She started making public statements about how she was forced to put gratuitous nudity in it, blah blah blah.

Question from ddirge Would you please ask Joe Bob the following question What can be done about the sorry state of horror films in the year 2000?

JoeBob MAKE A HORROR FILM!

ddirge What I mean is - why, in general are the movies that are made so bad, in your humble opinion

JoeBob Well, it's a very difficult form, and you have to be a true believer . . . A lot of people who try to make horror don't really believe in what they're making . . . and the audience always knows if the filmmaker is looking down at the audience. A good example is "The Mummy."

ddirge But I thought that was supposed to be "comic"...in a weird way

JoeBob It was an odd mixture of the comic and the serious, but . . . it didn't have any realism to the serious parts. It didn't really work because Brendan Fraser was in a different movie from Arnold Vosloo.

Question from jkazoo Joe Bob, beter Peter Jackson vehicle Bad Taste or Dead-Alive? I would have to say . . . Dead Alive.

JoeBob He's the John Waters of horror, isn't he?

tgoddess Joe Bob, would you mind if we open up the chat and just let people barrage you with questions? Can you handle it?

JoeBob SURE.

Only 43 people. Open it up.

tgoddess Okay gang. Hit joe bob wiht your best shot.

This is the second part of the transcript and is the un-moderated portion of the chat. The order it was posted has been edited to make some sense. And I am only posting the questions that Joe Bob actually answered. No typing errors have been edited... I did not make most of the mistakes you will read! (Y'all thank me for straightening this mess!!) Thankyouverymuch.

CeartCean What do you think of the Godzilla movies?

JoeBob I like the early Godzilla movies.

Doc JoeBob, Favorite Full Moon flick.....

JoeBob Not a big fan of Full Moon.

ddirge Blair Witch????

JoeBob Liek Blair Witch.

LindaG Joe Bob, what did you think of the remake of "The Haunting?"

JoeBob Didn't like the remake of The Haunting.

jkazoo Joe Bob, What's your take on HENRY Portrait of a Serial Killer?

JoeBob Love Henry Portrait.

hukfin hey joebob, do you miss the stylish gothic film s like Hammer studios and the old Universal pictures used to make ?

JoeBob I love the Hammer films, but they don't do that well on TV. I thinks it's a very small audience.

SashaofDe Favorite Stephen King adaption ?

JoeBob Favorite Stephen King probably Misery. (Would have to think about it.)

jeanne12 would you ever consider directing a movie, I know you could write an excellent screenplay.

JoeBob I would love to direct. Stephen King is not a very disciplined writer, so . . . his structures are sometimes weak . . . movies are structure structure structure.

Must company of wolves is your fav admit it

JoeBob Hate Company of Wolves. Artistic pseudointellectual crapola.

ddirge Opinion on Dario Argetno?

JoeBob Dario Argento greatest Italian filmmaker named Dario.

JCal JoeBob..which do you prefer..Alien or Aliens

JoeBob Aliens is better than Alien.

jagdescla joe bob did you read my letter about 'the road warriors' car being a ford falcon?

JoeBob It's not a Ford Falcon. I have 300 letters on this.

LindaG Did you like the Robert Wise version (The Haunting)

JoeBob Yes, I like the Robert Wise version of Haunting.

Jenny11 Did you like The Dead Zone?

JoeBob Love the Dead Zone.

monstrman What is your opinion of Phantasm?

JoeBob Phantasm one of the weirdest movies of all time.

terre-bo Joe Bob, what are your favorite movie with witches? I like Devils Rain

JoeBob Not a big fan of Devils Rain, but I like Black Sunday. Dir. by Mario Bava.

JCal I would love to act in your movie )

JoeBob JCal, can you act?

JCal I've been known too ... I've done a lot of community theater and was an extra in Last of the Mohicans

JoeBob JCal, did you play a MOhican?

JCal Joe Bob..I played a British soldier who got shot and got carried off dead )

Must did you like "I Spiton your grave"?

JoeBob "I Spit On Your Grave" is a great revenge movie. Very underrated. Ended that director's career.

Barb72 What is your honest opinion of "The Shining"?

JoeBob The Shining is great because of Kubrick.

Kelly don't you think Maximum Overdrive was steven king's best??

JoeBob Kelly, you're being a smartass. MAX OVERDRIVE?

Must you are ultra symbolic, Joe Bob

JoeBob Ultra-symbolic? Are you insulting me?

Jenny11 Hey, I think you should be a teacher

JoeBob What would I teach?

Jenny11 a professor of horror at a university somewhere

Menippee Trying to post a question again, as I suck at this, but do you think pregnancy has been sufficiently exploited as a horror theme?

JoeBob Pregnancy has been used quite a bit as a horror theme, yes, most notably in Rosemary's Baby.

JavaChat What about "Psycho"???

JoeBob Yes, I like Psycho. Seen it many times.

Jenny11 Somewhere down here in Texas!!

JoeBob Jenny11, what ARE you talking about?

Cuero Ever consider opening your own chain of drive-ins for us mutants?

JoeBob I've considered opening a chain of everything--if only someone would do the work for me.

Sir^Drake Ebert hates "I Spit On Your Grave" , says it's the worst movie of all time

JoeBob Ebert and Siskel both hated "I Spit," said it was an argument for film censorship . . . because they said it glorified rape . . . it is very pro-woman, in my opinion.

JCal For Love of the Game was not good Sam Raimi (

JoeBob JCal, good point about For Love of the Game.

GregB On your old TMC show, you called "The Hills Have Eyes" the scariest movie you ever saw. Where does it stand now?

JoeBob The HIlls Have eyes is certainly in the top five, GregB

terre-bo What about the "Sleepaway Camp" series? Made me think of my summer camp of youth!

JoeBob Oh, Sleepaway Camp! Those movies are so wonderful! The Sleepaway Camp series is so goofy and funny, AND scary.

JoeBob Well, not that scary.

Khyron Joe Bob, I think Matheson's 'I Am Legend' COULD be the best/scarriest horror story ever written, but it's never been done RIGHT in a movie. Am I crazy?

JoeBob Khyron, "I Am Legend" has been done 3 or 4 times. But the titles escape me right now.

Vino Joe Bob ............ The Deep had the pregnancy thing also ............... just not quite human ........

JoeBob Yes, Vino, you could say Alien had the pregnancy thing, all the Alien movies.

SashaofDe How do think Hannibal will turn out with out Jodie Foster?

JoeBob Not looking forward to Hannibal, to tell the truth.

Must could bad porn and horror combine/

JoeBob Bad porn IS horror, Must.

mzsaphir1 HEY DUDE HOW COME YOU ARE NOT ON MONSTERVISION ANY MORE AN HOW COME THIS SITE DOES NOT DO COLOR

JoeBob mzsaphire, please, go read the "Joe Bob's Advice to the Hopeless" letters.

terre-bo Joe Bob If you're ever in Houston, come to RADIO MUSIC THEATRE!

JoeBob terre-bo, I've heard of Radio Music Theatre for years. Sounds like fun.

ddirge Bad porn and Horror? Its called RABID

JoeBob RABID is not porn. It just has a porn star IN IT.

Kelly JB, did you like the remake of Psycho?

JoeBob No, I don't think the Psycho remake was very good.

Kelly Joe Bob, I'd do the work for ya.

JoeBob Kelly, the pay is really low.

JoeBob Well, kelly, the pay is ZERO

diandra my votes are for Halloween and In the Mouth of Madness. scary stuff.

JoeBob Diandra, I agree with you that In the Mouth of Madness is very underrated.

terre-bo Joe Bob Best/Most Unusual Horror Title?

JoeBob My favorite horror titles "Please Don't Eat My Mother" . . . "I Drink Your Blood" . . . "I Eat Your Skin" . . . and . . .

JoeBob "The Incrdibly Strange Creatures Who Stopped Living and Became Mixed-Up Zombies"

JavaChat If you're saying "I Spit" was pro-woman, OK, but most horror is anti-feminist, in that most horror movies portray the female as just standing around screaming -- except for Sigourney Weaver!

JoeBob JavaChat, that is COMPLETELY untrue. The woman is the survivor in almost every horror film. Jamie Lee Curtis survives . . . Marilyn Burns survives . . . it's almost a CLICHE that a woman is the smartest person in a horror film.

candy3k I have 6 of your Sleaziest Movies in the History of the World videos. How many did you make, and where can I buy the rest?

JoeBob candy3k, in the Sleaziest Movies series, we were supposed to release 24 of them. . . . I taped introductions and "outros" for 24 of them . . . but I have no idea how many were actually released.

skull Hey, speaking of rape, what was that movie with Rosanno Brazzi, story line like 'Brimstone & Treacle'?

JoeBob skull, you're talking about "Ms. 45," right?

terre-bo Joe Bob How many horror movies have you watched in your life?

JoeBob terre-bo, 47,000 movies.

monstrman Which Hellraiser was your favorite

JoeBob monstrman, Hellraiser 1 was my favorite.

JoeBob I'm trying to catch up here. Sorry.

JoeBob Sorry, guys, I tried to answer as many as possible.

tgoddess I would like to thank Joe Bob for coming in and chatting with us this evening, and we hope to make this a monthly event.

tgoddess Thanks again, Joe Bob.

JoeBob Bye everybody! We need to have a little better system next time so I can really answer the questions.

tgoddess Hopefully, we'll have you back again soon.

Annie Thanks Joe Bob

JoeBob G'night