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Why does God love Tim Tebow but hate the Broncos?

WRITING - Joe Bob's America

Have you noticed how much time God has been spending on home runs and slam-dunks lately? This winter I think God scored half the touchdowns in the NFL. I've never seen so many wide receivers crossing themselves in the end zone and giving thanks for those six points.

No wonder we've still got wars. God has turned into a totally SHALLOW Supreme Being.

Here's what I wanna know:


If these professional jocks thank God every time they win a game, do they also BLAME God every time they LOSE a game?

It would make sense, wouldn't it? If he's gonna win for em, then he's gonna lose for em, too.

Or, if they're all that goldurn religious, if they truly have the unquestioning faith of St. Augustine, then why wouldn't they THANK God every time they lose? If God is the Author of All Things--if he's willing it and doing it all the time--then he's making em lose, too.

But you never hear this. You never hear a post-game interview that starts out, "First of all, I'd like to thank God Almighty for causing me to drop that pass in the end zone. I'd also like to thank my family, the coaches, all the people who made it possible for us to lose this game."

Wouldn't this be a more CONSISTENT Fellowship of Christian Athletes faith statement?

But the main thing that burns my bacon is that these holy rollers, holy dribblers, and holy puck chasers always ASSUME that God's main job is to monitor their personal lives and make sure they get everything they need.

Maybe God needs something for his own self

Perhaps He gets tired of being a babysitter in athletic stadiums.

"Damn it, I knew I should have Tebow'd this"


I would like to talk to Him about it. I would like to go up to Him, wherever He sits during gametime, and say, "God, do you REALLY watch every athletic event in the world and decide who You want to win? Do you do stuff like give Timmy Tebow stomach cramps on game day so he can't play as well? Do you put a little sweat on the football so you get a fumble in the fourth quarter? Is your brain REALLY the equivalent of one MILLION video screens, showing all the games being played in the world, all day long, so you can keep score in heaven?"

I mean, maybe he does. After all, he can be everywhere at the same time, right? He can get involved as much as he wants to, right? He can do WHATEVER THE HECK HE WANTS TO DO.

OK, So what I really wanna know is . . .


If we humans can't even accept that God would DESIRE us to lose an athletic event, how can we ever accept that he creates hurricanes and wars and our Grandma dying of liver cancer.

If all things come from God, then ALL THINGS COME FROM GOD.

Right?

 

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