Big Steve King hooked three stories
together and linked em together with a little obnoxious cat that
runs all up and down the East Coast. First the cat runs into
"Quitters, Inc.," the one about the guy who goes to Marlboro
School, but when he gets there, a Mafia guy is waiting to tell
him that, if he can't stop smoking, they're gonna turn his wife
into a human cattle prod. James Woods fails the smoking test, so
Alan King lights up the Juice Room with a little spouse meat,
till Jimbo learns his lesson. Then the cat runs off to Atlantic
City and watches a fat-cat gambler bet Robert Hays can't walk all
the way around a high-rise on the ledge. First prize: the fat
cat's heavy wife. Next the cat decides to bust into Drew
Barrymore's bedroom and fight against a midget troll monster to
prove it's not cats that steal children's breath, but ugly little
rat-face trolls that jump out of the wall and slobber all over
the Tinker Toys. When the cat and the troll battle to the death,
it's one of the finest special-effects sequences ever filmed in
Wilmington, North Carolina. Two dead bodies. One dead bird. One
pint blood. Three beasts, including Alan King. Barbecued cat.
Barbecued wife. Cameo appearance by Cujo. Gratuitous double plug
for the song "I'll Be Watching You." Head rolls. Fingers roll.
Great klaxon-horn impalement. Cat Fu. Reddy Kilowatt Fu. With
Candy Clark as the evil wife, Kenneth McMillan as the fat cat.
Directed by Lewis Teague.  |