Six-foot-one Amazon B-movie
Garbonza Goddess Julie Strain is Chief Pleasure Mistress for a
gang of pituitary-gland-stealing topless-bar lovers who smoke
fine cigars and seek eternal youth in this post-holocaust
Canadian cheapie set in a frigid blizzard-covered earth. (Hey, it
could happen.) In love with the oppressive ruler--the tough-
talking Jeff Wincott--she longs for her family, still huddling in
underground sewers, coughing up phlegm and sacrificing the life
of Julie's brother to the rebel band of snowmobilers led by Paul
Rapovski and his nunchuck-slinging cohorts. When a young girl is
brought to her for a little non-elective surgery with a bonesaw--
part of the "rejuvenation process"--Julie goes berserk and starts
karate-kickin the drooling class upside the head. But not,
fortunately, before she spends 80 per cent of the movie taking
off Frederick's of Hollywood lingerie, toweling off, and engaging
in Extracurricular Aardvarkus with Wincott. At one point she
suffers from hypothermia, so her concerned comrades strip off all
her clothes except for a spaghetti-strap T-shirt and pour hot
water down the front of it. Thirteen dead bodies. Thirty-three
breasts. Giant asteroid head-on. Two snowmobile armada battles.
Multiple aardvarking. Bikini-clad fire-eaters. Anesthesia-free
neck surgery. Hypodermic to the heart. One motor vehicle chase.
Gratuitous heavy-bag workout. Eight Kung Fu scenes. Flamethrower
Fu. Lesbo Fu. Poison-tipped dart Fu. With Eva Dawn Nemeth as
Priscilla the kung-fu dominatrix. Julie has the best line: "Oh
baby, I love it when you get all Neanderthal on me like that."
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